Sorry for the late post again. Quick update: Week 8 was the end of Phase 2, so it was a recovery workout week. I have 5 weeks remaining and I’ll be done! Yay!
Working out changes the way I look at other people. It is a mixture of unnecessary judgment and legitimate concern, which is a complicated thing to notice about myself. Of course, the last thing I want is to become an arrogant snob who looks down upon everyone who doesn’t exercise. However, I want to encourage people to exercise because I genuinely care about their health. Finding a balance between the two can be difficult.
I wish for the American population to be healthy. It was shocking to first arrive at the United States and find really big people all over the place! And as a fat and inactive child I had endured plenty of insecurities that I wish upon nobody. I live with my grandparents, who are rapidly developing all sorts of health problems due to not having taken care of themselves in their younger days.
So I do P90X and try to live a relatively healthy lifestyle. However along the way I can’t ignore friends who gorge themselves in junk food, girls who might snap in half if I pat their shoulders, or … my mother.
My mother is, like me, very cute (maybe it should be the other way around, but whatever). She is … uh… round. She’s not super-size, by American standards, and she still moves around at work. But when she’s at home, she’s pretty sedentary in front of the computer or lying down (thanks to the invention of smartphones), often accompanied by unhealthy snacks. She is not without hope yet, but seeing all of my grandmother’s health problems (high blood pressure, high cholesterol, overweight, heart problems) feels like foreshadowing of what my mom is going to face.
So I keep telling my mom to exercise, but she doesn’t. And I feel like a parent who pressures his kid too hard. Another problem is that I think my mother is supa cute when she eats! This sounds funny, but really it brings me joy to see her eat and be happy. And I think having some chubs makes her more motherly (not to mention it feels good to hug her). So I’m always torn between these two conflicting desires.
I was stressing out over this the other night and I wondered if I’m becoming a snob who unfairly puts everyone on my personal standards of fitness. After all, there are many many people who never exercise and live relatively happily for many decades. Maybe it’s more important that she’s happy eating and lounging around, rather than exercising intensely for her son’s fitness craze.
That night I decided I was going to stop being so critical of my mother’s health.
But the next morning, my mom got headaches and found her blood pressure was high.
What is this, I don’t even…