Today’s Art of Manliness assignment was to come up with a budget, for that would help me be in better control of money.

Well, let’s start with the easiest part to figure out, which is my income:  $0.

Therefore it can be quite easily proven that any sort of budget I come up with will be unsustainable, and therefore fail.  Contrary to popular belief, I am not without hope, for I do not plan on being jobless for eternity.  As circumstances change, my budget will have to adjust, but for the meanwhile, it doesn’t hurt to establish a budget, no matter how unsustainable it is, so that at least I know how long I can survive (#2012-the-world-ends-anyways-yolo?).

The current money I have:
$2357.66 in bank
+ $260 emergency money
+ $1 in my wallet
= $2618.66.

Monthly income:

Fixed monthly expenses:  
$205.90 for car payment
+ 39.99 gym membership*
+ $31.00 donation (dollar a day) to Unseen Stories (fighting child trafficking in Africa)
= $276.89.

Variable monthly expenses:
$45 for funsies
$30 for gasoline (it’s only $30 because my parents said they’d give me some gas money in return for all the errands I do (ex. drive G-parents to hospital appointments etc.))
+ $50 for all other things (birthday gifts, necessities, church offerings, etc.)
= $125.

Total expenses:  $401.89 per month.  Of course, this is just a guesstimate and hopefully I spend less than this.

Thus according to this budget, I’ll survive… $2618.66 / ($401.89/month) = 6.5 months.  And if I’m smart enough and not spend as much as I planned above (see * at bottom), I can last 7 months.  That will put me at like May of 2013, which is plenty of time for the world to end!  Also I expect that I won’t be playing around at home for THAT long.  Or maybe I can pawn something…  I’m actually not that worried about money.  Such worldly things have no power over me because I’m awesome like that.


Simeon Koh

*I went in to cancel my gym membership the other day to reduce my expenses, but the dude there offered me one month free and $10 off the month after.  So I get a couple months to reevaluate whether I want to keep or terminate my gym membership.